Are You In The Middle Of A Marriage Crisis? Find Ways To Help Today
Yesterday, things were fine in your life. You had a routine life with a marriage that you felt was ‘good enough.’ You probably never thought that today you would be in the midst of a marriage crisis. Many couples are blindsided by issues in the marriage that cause them to be in a marriage crisis…where you are unsure about whether or not the relationship will survive one more day.
Step one is to calm down. Just like with any other crisis situation, a cool head
will take you much further toward a solution.
No matter what individual event caused the sudden sense of marriage crisis, you can be assured it did not happen overnight. In fact, marriage crisis – when two people are stretched to their emotional limits, is a culmination of events. You have probably suffered from long-term communication problems, lack of intimacy, disregard, disrespect, resentment and hurt for some time now. But today, the whole thing boils over. Making a rash and emotionally fueled decision in this state of mind will not solve any problems and often, makes things worse. Still, something has to be done!
The first piece of advice in a marriage crisis is to create some distance. Literally! If the two of you remain in the same room or house at this point, nothing good will evolve. Instead, take some time to take care of you and move away from the situation so you can get your emotions under control. Decide that a 2-day marital reprieve is in order and do just that. For those two days – take your time to cool off and begin to make a decision about whether you are going to save the marriage or not. Allow your partner to do the same. During this time of marriage crisis, write down all the things that you feel and want to say to your spouse. Keep this list handy for a few days and add to it as you go.
Once this time is over, you and your spouse should set up a time to meet. You might want to schedule dinner in a restaurant or meet at a local park rather than be confined in your home together. This way, you are more likely to keep things under control. Then, remember your list. Communication can be difficult for couples during a marriage crisis and the best thing to do is have a clearly written outline of what you want to say. Then, take turns doing just that. Don’t interrupt your partner when they talk and make sure that you aren’t interrupted as well.
This talking out period will give you a good idea of whether or not the two of you can save the marriage or not. It is good to remember that healthy and successful marriages experience marriage emergencies from time to time. One big thing doesn’t mean that your marriage is over. You may find that having the opportunity to be alone, regain control of your thoughts and emotions and share honestly with your spouse is just what you needed to take things to the next level and not another marriage crisis.