Save The Marriage In A Hostile World
Save the marriage because it is worth saving, no matter what others say.
It is easy to see that the significance of marriage has been on the decline in recent years. Divorce is so easy to obtain and images in the media tend to glamorize the return to the single lifestyle. Marriage, as an institution, is practically being assaulted by mixed messages.
With many high-profile marriages on the rocks and stories of failed relationships, the question is, “Is it still plausible to have a happy marriage?” The good news is that not only is it plausible, but it is entirely possible. Even those with shaky relationships can save the marriage by focusing on individuals and personal experience rather than the big picture.
In the first place, marriages work because of the two people involved. While the support of other people can be quite helpful, they are not the key ingredients in the way to save a marriage. Do not allow yourself to be influenced by what you read in the papers or what you hear from friends and family. In fact, the most successful marriages are the ones that guard it fiercely against the influence of others.
The first step to save the marriage even when a lot of people are against it is to make a firm decision to do so. Find out the source of the problem and mull over it. This is the stage where the counsel of people can be of value. If it is something that you think you can get past and you are convinced that the relationship is worth saving, then commit to that. However, once you have made the decision then stick to it regardless of the criticism.
There are some situations when it may be the families that are against the reconciliation. This represents a particularly tricky predicament. The ideal situation would be that all the loved ones involved get along. No matter what the families’ reasons are for rejecting the attempt to save the marriage, what can be done is to give them time to heal. They too can feel hurt in a rocky relationship because they care for their family members. However, it is important to be firm in explaining that the decision is to work out the marriage.
Given that, the couple has to be decisive in their decision to stay in the relationship. Their actions have to reflect this choice to the rest of the world. External negativity can be avoided if both the husband and the wife are vocal about wanting to save the marriage. This means refraining from bashing each other when out with friends.
Limit confidantes to prevent gossip and make sure to keep the details of the issues confidential. Otherwise, it would be more difficult for others to take the decision to stay together seriously. For example, if a marriage counselor is sought to help save the marriage, talk it over with the professional instead of chatting with friends. Resist the temptation to gain sympathy from others. Instead, the husband and wife should focus on each other and work on the relationship free from what the outside world thinks and hopefully save the marriage.