The Magic Of Making Up: Mistakes To Avoid
Experience The Magic Of Making Up By Avoiding Common Mistakes.
No marriage is deemed perfect. By virtue of it being composed of individuals, each with their own quirks and flaws, disagreement is bound to happen. A happy marriage is not one that is free of problems. Rather, it is one where the couple can work through mistakes as a team.
In fact, difficulties are what makes the couple become closer and have a stronger relationship. The difference between marriages that work out and those that don’t is how the magic of making up is utilized. The apology and the resulting behavior afterwards ensures that the marriage gets to be on the mend.
When pursuing forgiveness and change, there are some common pitfalls that should be avoided. Reconciliation is not just about being able to say an apology. Depending on the gravity of the issue confronting the couple, more may be required in order to achieve the magic of making up.
One of the most important things to remember is to never lie to the spouse regarding the problem. Whether it is as serious as infidelity or a forgotten chore, lying is not the solution to the problem. Breaking the trust is often the root cause of most marital issues. In the event that there is already a lack of trust, truth is the only way that it can be rebuilt. Any kind of reconciliation and the magic of making up should stem from honesty and a clean slate.
A common mistake in reconciliation is when one person rushes the magic of making up. When one person feels slighted or hurt, allow the person to feel their pain. Each individual feels emotions differently so pressuring the other person to feel better at a certain pace can do more damage than good. Instead, a show of empathy can do wonders for the relationship. It shows a sense of sincerity on the part of the offending party and allows the person who was hurt the most the luxury of healing.
Admitting the mistake and acknowledging the selfishness of the motives are guaranteed ways of bringing about the magic of making up. It tells the other person that change is on the way. It also allows them to feel that the hurt they feel is justified so they can focus on the healing. Avoid shifting the blame to the circumstances, ignorance, or even the other person. Taking on the responsibility of your own words and actions signals a maturity that is healthy for any type of relationship.
Finally, no reconciliation can ever take place if there is still a desire to pursue the same old lifestyle or habits that were done prior to the offense. With an apology comes a change in behavior. This has to be clear to both parties; otherwise, a pattern of useless apologies will take place. There will be no true healing for both the husband and the wife. The best relationships are those where the people involved become better people because of each other. Allow that experience to occur by initiating changes for the better and when that happens, you too may know the magic of making up.